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Jan 7 2010

Words to Live By

, Living , ,

"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." - Robert Heinlein

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Jun 19 2009

Worst Guild Candidate Ever!

, Humor , ,

It looks like I well might be first out of the gate on this one. It is just that this idea jumped so completely formed out of my head as soon as I read about the contest that the folks who create The Guild are running.

I actually wrote the script and sent it to Heather (my lovely wife who appears over my shoulder). Originally I had planned it this way but I actually may film it with roles reversed to see if it comes of as funnier (or just sad and mean). It is a testament to the idea that even after four takes and constant re-viewings I still chuckle at it (and Heather really laughs).

I may post links to other entries here (if I ever find them) and I'll continue to pimp my video. Please rate it on You Tube and leave a comment there rather than here.

TRANSCRIPT:

PLAYER: "Hi, this is David I play...
               peers at screen
PLAYER: UniKron 'underscore' 683 in the game.  I read that you were looking for a new guild member.
               I've only been playing about a month but my wife has been playing for more than a year.
               turns around
               Is it a year, honey?
WIFE: waves hand but doesn't turn around
PLAYER: Yes it's a year. 
               I started playing so we could do something together.
               turns around and reaches to rub WIFE'S shoulder
WIFE Get off!  I'm in combat!
               still not looking WIFE rolls shoulder to throw off  PLAYER'S hand
PLAYER Shrugs but plods on
              Anyways, my wife tells me I need to be less of a ... noob?
              Turns around and thinks better of asking WIFE
              Noob.  That's the word.  I have a lot of ... interesting equipment and a more than enough gold that she's given me to get me started. 
              I was hoping you'd have a place. for me.
             (looks back then leans forward conspiratorially)
             She says once I get to 40th level we can quest together. I'm only (peers at screen) um....hang on
             (turns around and glances back apprehensively at camera)
             Hang on. Honey? Dear? What level am I again?
             (smiles at camera sheepishly)
WIFE (mumbles something and gestures dismissively)
PLAYER I'll get back to you on that, okay?

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